Restless

Over the past few days I’ve started to feel restless and ask, “Is what I am doing, what I am supposed to be doing?” I studied to be a Counsellor and I am not using those skills to help people. Although, I do believe I can help people where I am anyway. I am also wondering if I can do more to rehabilitate myself and become more independent. I don’t think I have accomplished much since my operation. I have just become more comfortable. I still need everything done for me that I needed doing before.

I have just finished reading “Lost on Earth” by Steve Crombie and I think this book has really pushed my buttons about where I am at. He chose to travel around the world on a motorbike. I am always talking about travelling to Europe but I don’t seem to go anywhere.

How do I move forward? What next steps can I make?

On Thursday I am going to have a series of tests and then have my device turned ‘off’ or ‘on’. How am I going to cope with this?

I think I am feeling really tired and well overdue for a holiday!

- Martha